ESBL

一波未停，一波又来。
路那么长，真得走到一波三折吗？
我突然明白那师父所说的了。

To Endure, I can't, but have to.

Some facts, I can't endure anylonger anymore...

小时候的记忆，我想，最早期应该在三、四岁那年开始，依稀记得自己是不碰牛奶的，就只喝美绿，完全没办法想起当初怎么学走路 什么时候开始跑跑跳跳 也不知道那时跌倒了谁把我扶起来 尿尿到底是用传统尿布还是束裤纸尿片，但我记得4岁那年我是怎么学习乘法表，我也记得6岁那年失踪后自己是如何镇定地寻找办法，然后就是幼稚园的毕业庆典表演，然后就上小学，从没记忆到有记忆的成长，那是一门独有的家教训练，很老土的一句：我们一出生到这世上来，我们不会走不会跳不懂语言不懂判断，一切都是“被训练”出来的。我今天怎么做人，就是当初我怎么被训练的。一个人走得直不直，站得正不正，思路清不清，有赖调教他的人，就算先天不足，后天还是会遇上某某伯乐或恩师的，再幸运的 会遇上能互补不足的另一半，这是福气。
倘若有一天我不再会走路，请用调教baby的方式来引导我，假如我听不明指示，请先教会我你用的语言，如果你爱我的话，请别假手于别人，我只是在跑一场意志力马拉松，我的编号不叫负担。

终于

终于有睡眠不足的feel 了。
喉咙干干的，有点咳嗽，是热气吧，下巴多了一粒硬硬的暗疮，双眼多了两个圈圈，两个肩膀像不锈钢锅那样又硬又厚又重，晚餐吃了一顿又另一顿，我知道我的真身回来了，心里头多了一份安心，这是天赐的福气，来来回回奔奔波波又担心又忧虑顾左顾右顾前顾后的日子换来哭笑不得的一幕幕，原来等待也是一种福气。
终于这一晚，没有Popeye的按摩也能熟睡。
我唱了无数遍：爱是恒久忍耐又有恩慈，爱是不嫉妒，爱是不自夸不张狂，不做害羞的事，不求自己的益处，不轻易发怒，不计算人家的恶，不喜欢不义只喜欢真理，凡事包容凡事相信凡事盼望凡事忍耐，爱是永不止息。

As an Industrial Engineer...

Capacity planning is the process of determining the production capacity needed by an organization to meet changing demands for its products.^[1] In the context of capacity planning, "capacity" is the maximum amount of work that an organization is capable of completing in a given period of time. The phrase is also used in business computing as a synonym for Capacity Management
A discrepancy between the capacity of an organization and the demands of its customers results in inefficiency, either in under-utilized resources or unfulfilled customers. The goal of capacity planning is to minimize this discrepancy. Demand for an organization's capacity varies based on changes in production output, such as increasing or decreasing the production quantity of an existing product, or producing new products. Better utilization of existing capacity can be accomplished through improvements in overall equipment effectiveness (OEE). Capacity can be increased through introducing new techniques, equipment and materials, increasing the number of workers or machines, increasing the number of shifts, or acquiring additional production facilities.
Capacity is calculated: (number of machines or workers) × (number of shifts) × (utilization) × (efficiency).

阿四

虽然已经略知一二，但还是意外地被惊了几惊喜了几喜，书写画画，差在没琴棋之艺而已，戏剧性的情绪起伏是难免的，明白他求胜心切的性格，我也心软了。今晚，只求睡得安稳，明早醒得快乐，明天还是要过的。

101 Miracles

Plant Faith
Water with Love
Fertilize with Confidence
Miracles are the fruits
where family members are the branches
Thanks GOD provided the Seed a chance to live n to grow~
Life is such a Miracle but health is not granted.

开心的眼泪一点也不咸，太神奇太不可思议了，早上淘叔叔才转告我，师父说国宝将会-走得跑得- 下午那通电话就报喜讯了，第101天，终于守得云开见月明！

Happiest!!!

往那人间地狱C10-14绕了一圈，世界末日似的渡过了5个小时，看见国宝一脸的恐慌与不知所措，我快崩溃了。漏夜潜逃出来才后知后觉地发现钱的魔力，钱的万能，和人性的丑陋。谁说好马不吃回头草？好草才不怕回头吃呢，甚至还怕吃不着吃不及呢。
往地狱绕了一圈回来，我在天堂看见神迹。我在天堂嗅到浓浓人情味，白衣天使欢乐地告诉我神迹！遇见了Worst，前路就只能看见Better了，那本能的意志力，欠缺一点点的信心鼓励也不能成事，抹了国宝的眼泪，抹不掉我心如刀割的痛，看见努力把身体撑起来的那股劲，感谢神，感谢所有看顾他的，感谢所有庇佑他的，感谢帮助我们的天使们，亲人的支持更胜一切，这就是血浓于水的奥妙。何谓feeling good? - 不是happy, 不是satisfied, 是Happiest!! 这时刻，还计较语文语法么？哈！

BreakEven

Be thankful. Have faith. Believe in miracles and believe in ourselves. Love others the way you wish to be loved. Respect them just how you wish to be respected. and, Say it~ I  LOVE  YOU.

American Idol 2011 Chris Medina Fiance Has Brain Damage and Sings His Heart Break Even For her

I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing
Just prayed to a God that I don't believe in
'Cause I got time while she got freedom
'Cause when a heart breaks, no it don't breakeven

Her best days will be some of my worst
She finally met a man that's gonna put her first
While I'm wide awake she's no trouble sleeping
'Cause when a heart breaks, no it don't breakeven, even, no

What am I suppose to do
When the best part of me was always you and
What am I suppose to say
When I'm all choked up and you're okay

I'm falling to pieces, yeah
I'm falling to pieces

They say bad things happen for a reason
But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding
'Cause she's moved on while I'm still grieving
And when a heart breaks, no it don't breakeven, even, no

I'm falling to pieces
(One's still in love while the other one's leaving)
I'm falling to pieces
('Cause when a heart breaks, no it don't breakeven)

You got his heart and my heart and none of the pain
You took your suitcase, I took the blame
Now I'm tryna make sense of what little remains, oh
'Cause you left me with no love and no love to my name

第98天

凌晨4点就醒了，眼睛是疲累的，但还是得撑开，98天了，我的确看见神迹，伤口的复原是可观的，不能再贪心奢求了，撑到今天已经是很不容易的事了，4个月前，我还兴高采烈地在等待我难得安排的星加坡之旅，当然也非常期待我的吴哥窑之旅，因为叶威明风水师说我的八字今年会有好多到国外的机会，旅行也会带来更多的好运气。我们不止一次的尝试编排到台湾的行程，但往往就是一年拖一年，一年又一年的把它耽搁了，现在，能陪他看看电视播出的美食节目和世界奇观，我已经很感恩了。凌晨的对白，我重新把入院到手术后的细节慢慢地告诉国宝，他都记不起了，多好，何必沉溺在痛苦的经验呢？人，总得往前看，往以后的日子努力，收在我里面的，不开心的，生气的，后悔的，自责的，怀疑的，懊恼的，无助的，沮丧的，感恩的，激动的，我没办法delete，这几个月让我上了人生很大很大很艰难的课，这堂课还没敲钟下堂呢！我会在什么时候 毕业下堂呢？神对我的考验，能顺利过关么？
孙医生说：Have Faith! Always Have Faith! - 谢谢。一两句激励的话是很powerful 的，它让我无惧地继续我该担当的。
100天后，我不胆小了。200 天后，一切都能如愿么？

--我晓得 时间如雪 有时候会覆盖一切

娱人节

娱人欢乐也好，自娱也好，开心就好！这天是要怀念--哥哥-- 的~。

不懂

不懂身边的人需要怎样的关怀，这个人，不懂何谓关怀。
不认为付出是一种福气的人，这个人，不懂何谓牺牲。
相信命运天注定的人，这个人，不懂何谓争取，何谓改变。

Simpson.My.Angel

God has been really good to me, God sent me another angel, to read 1-2-3 with me, and also to do 1+2+3 with me, that's always my luck... to be surrounded by angels, luvly one~ charming one~ unselfish one~
God also arranged a wonderful shelter for Belle. God knows my toughtime, God listened to my prayers, God made miracles happened. And so, I'll keep praying hard..... I can't wait to see miracles happen on ME, I just have too many wishes... I'm a demanding daughter to him~
I'm waiting for my mushroom to grow me like SuperMario... bigger n bigger, stronger n stronger, more n more mushrooms. more n more gold coins for me~ :-)

Quote10

" 既然上了賊船，就要做個成功的海盜。"

有得选择的话。。。

在有选择能力的情况下，任谁也想当那个做抉择的人，谁会自愿放弃选择的权力呢？
你会想要-选你所想择你所要-的 还是希望一切都被违愿安排呢？亲人，我们没得选，天注定的血缘，我们只好接受，那~身外物呢？另一半呢？工作呢？前途呢？健康的体魄？退休后的生活呢？下一代的续缘呢？我们所追求的物质，我们暗恋的对象，我们期待的dreamhouse，我们渴望的奢侈，最后，只能说一句：己所不欲，勿施于人。你，可以选择不要，但请你别随意施舍。你，可以任意做决定，但请你别忽略前因后果。你，可以爱，可以不爱，但请别留下悔恨，你也可以大大方方当个笨傻瓜，但别天真的认为聪敏的我是又聋又盲又哑巴，我是会生气的，我生气的时候，如果有得选择的话，我会希望任吃不肥，越吃越苗条，嘴巴塞满了食物就不必生别人的气了。
闷气，有得选的话，我想重来。

Quote9

"You have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.
You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever.
This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life."
- Steve Jobs

EXACTLY!

难舍

千言万语/王菲
我出生那年的邓丽君

不知道为了什么
忧愁它围绕着我
我每天都在祈祷
快赶走爱的寂寞
那天起 你对我说
永远的爱着我
千言和万语
随浮云掠过

亲情

是信任
是支持
是爱护
是忍耐
是后盾
是捍卫
是原谅
是安慰
是包容 是包涵
是血脉相连 血浓于水 无限付出
不计算 不记仇 不回避 不求回报
只求安心
只求团聚
我还是那句：人在做，天在看，天知地知你知我知他也会知。

（后注：朋友的亲人的无限帮忙，是会幸运地中字的！）

我的新志愿

假如我是心理学家，事情会不会容易办得多呢？
要揣摩情绪病，本身的情绪控制就是一门学问了，原本的我是那么的情绪化那么的不知所措那么的急需精神与心灵上的支援，但神给了我考验，艰难的，感觉上我变成了柯楠，日日夜夜都在侦查情绪病的根源，到底--答案在哪里？

MaquiJuice

MaquiJuice@RM117 - Miracle Juice? nah... yet to read such an outbreaking news, but I won't mind to spend a little money to 'research' just a little bit more on it, yup~ that's me: Never Try Never Know... and I wanna experience it so I could tell the 'results', then I shall able to SHOUT it out LOUD: Shoooooooo... you all nonsense products Shooooooooooooooo!! BUT, if this line 'these statements have not been evaluated by the FDA...' is giving me just another detox-juice, spending a little for now to avoid more friends being cheated --> Worth it still.
Another Friday nite with a lovely visitor, always my great listener :-)
How many more Fridays I gotto be here? GOD... please guide me.

Frenz Are To Call, Not To Bore

So, I'm the lucky one.
Oh yeah... I found my keys, I found the spares too. I've got someone many ones to help me out. You know what? it's very true~ friends are for you to call, to call up to check their status, to call up to check if they need help,to call up for food for games for leisure, to call them up when you need help & attention. How many friends on your cellphone address book? do you really call them up often? perhaps I should ask: Do you care to make a greeting call to your frenz for a casual chat? I care. Do call me, not to bore.

Disturbance

Ooohhh... what a miserable day!
2 days ago, failed to renew the roadtax and realized there's a blacklisted-summons on-hold.
yesterday, the CRV battery was dead without any symptoms. well~ can't blaim much, it's my fault that I never maintain any car. and the Waja also didn't really perform well in the heavy rain last nite, but thanks God, I reached my destiny safely. I was praying hard to have the power windows functioning as normal, thanks God again, they did.
This morning, I was so ready to call somebody to bring in a new battery for the CRV, but the car keys gone in the wind... so, what's next? how worse it can go? I don't know...

阻力令我沮丧

我承认，我不会替车子轮胎充气。笨吗？
搞到十个手指头都脏兮兮的，才惊觉自己是在替轮胎放风，原想证明自己是能克服一切的难题，却连这么简单的琐事都搞不定，只能怪怕事的自己太太太依赖他了，想尽办法自助的时候真的很沮丧。

（再续）

爆了

今天心情超低落，不受控的，感觉到我的小宇宙有被炸开了一角，心灵疲惫，很孤军作战子弹也没的无助，眼珠也有爆开的感觉，头昏脑涨，咖啡喝了一杯又一杯，麻烦的事就一桩接一桩，不顺意的事情都像约好一起来的，难到今天不利巨蟹座么？
看见国宝右手握住我左手呼噜睡去，我知道我按摩的功夫不是盖的，但我能把强悍的他按醒吗？我愿意。

玉兰肥鸡

一路上雨不停，碰上好几单车祸，赶到医院都很晚了，赶紧把玉兰肥鸡端上，国宝开心大笑，一眼就把适苑的招牌玉兰肥鸡叫出来了，让他吃了几口，心情大好，每张照片里的佳肴他都是那么地熟悉。。。看见了泪光，真的很难受。曾经，好多年前，我不悦地对国宝说：“为什么你就爱吃粗粗干干的鸡胸肉？嫩嫩的鸡腿才好吃呢!我们的喜爱怎么不一样？”国宝这么告诉我：“这才是我们最-夹-的地方，不管一只还是半只鸡，总之一盘鸡来到，我吃鸡胸肉，鸡腿都留给你，不必吵也不必争，刚刚好。”我真的好后悔，我真的很自责，我真的错了，我都错过了。

~BalikBandar~

For Him - on March19



Surprise is always surprise, priceless, regardless.



~Swing~Swing~Swing~

Someone said it me today: it's been long you didn't update your blog!
wow~ since when? since when you guys are anticipating for my post? or, you're just waiting for more juicy gossips? well~ I always see myself a very adaptive person until my buddy told me that's called resilient, so, my mood swing with my close ones. When he's anxious, me too. When he sleepless, me too. When he fart, i fart louder, and I thank God that I can still fart out loud. Recently, his appetite improved, me too. Seeing him losing that much of weight, you should noticed that I'm absorbing those kgs.
Back to the ward, weirdo everywhere everyday.
Don't they realized the THINGS they took/used are not supposed to be shared? Can't they hang their undies somewhere else? should I beg them to keep the toilet rolls INSIDE the toilet? worst, ain't they here to take care or accompany the patient? why are they so kepor about eyeing on the neighbor? @.@
Why can't they just keep those Q&A funtime with their doctors? Do I look like an artist waiting for interviews?

Have A Break!

Oh Yes. Everyone needs a break. I need a break too. Gimme A Break.
-PEACE-
-------    ----------             ------------        -----  --------         -----------  ----
Great. Finally everyone is taking a break now. NO VISITOR.
and finally I'm home, lights' on, TV's on, Aircon's on, fan's on, sleepless nite.
when I woke up in the morning, I could feel my puffy eyes hanging on my restless brain.
What a break.
-------    ----------             ------------        -----  --------         -----------  ----

It'a sunny sunday today. 雨过天晴.

人非草木

我生气了。
我在这边不停地替他人着想，很想减轻他们的负担，想让大家各忙各的，但事情发展到今天，实在太不如我意了，你跟我说你累，你累什么累呢？我都把担子扛起来了，你还敢说累？！还敢说什么我也已经很累 我应该回家休息，拜托，我就是因为你说帮忙帮到累了，要我把它们解决掉，我才每天来回岛与岛之间，阿姨们也别再问为什么我这么晚才到医院了，我的原因就是因为：他们不扛的，我扛。你们来到病房，就只有不停的问：为什么没做这个 为什么没给那个 医生说什么 为什么这里会这样 为什么那里是酱的 为什么食物吃不完 为什么这这这？为什么那那那？ 天啊！！！ 你像我一样的做多一点点 探他多一点点 陪他久一点再学如何从病人的角度去想他要的是什么，你会找到答案的。假如有一天我遇状况了，不同宗教信仰的你，会为我向主耶稣祷告么？你会为我翻开圣经唱爱的箴言么？当你在说-为他好-这三个字的时候，我真心希望那都是从他的出发点去想。
为他，我一定点也不累，我该怕的都不怕了，看见他我就安心，任他发脾气什么的我也不在乎，因为我有更重要的目标，就是要他开心的活下去，他值得他曾经所拥有的。我会累，是因为我要应对的人与事，太煎熬我的思绪了，神又在考验我了，我需要更多的智慧和能量去抵挡那些煎熬我的对白 和解决那些他们帮不上忙的事，我也感激上天对我的看顾，我总有谅解我的朋友 谅解我的同事 谅解我的家人 还有谅解我的自己。你们不会明白，那么多在谅解我帮忙我和聆听我的朋友，其实都在帮了你们许许多多，没有这些天使们，我也没办法去扛你们扛不了的。
别再低估我的能量小宇宙了，我只要你想，想一想：“换成是我，我要我的亲人爱人怎么样？” （认真的想一想吧）

------------------------------------------------
Yes, I am angry.
Just less than 3 months, and you're telling me you are tired, yet, you kept mentioning to me that you're gonna do things that's good for "long-term". What is LONG TERM now?
I never deny your intention, I know all of us trying our best for him, but can we not to set the limit other than the dollars? You all asking me to STOP, REST, and RELAX, have you ever ask me if these are what I need now? I need to force myself to go "somewhere" to pretend I'm resting so you all could FEEL I am relax, and that ADD whole lots of burden to me. You told me you could HELP to take care the empty house and dogs, and now you told me you already got tired and wanted me to "settle" them, THEN please don't offer help, indeed, I will goto work everyday, meet my nice friends and colleagues everyday, and yet, i go home take care the dogs everyday, and i can still come back to the ward to see him and take care of him. I'm not superwoman, I'm not heroin, I'm not doing charity here, I'm doing things that I know he wants me to do even though he very very very sorry to add burden on me.
I want to say: it's our 8th years now, I never got tired to share my life with him, but I am now truly tired to talk to you all just to hope you all could understand me and him a little bit more. Please don't put words into my mouth, and don't stuff thoughts into my mind.

I will leave if that's all he wants from me.
I may rest as you wish if anyone of you could take over my role.

我的近况

最近，我凌晨5点就起身了，上班前的功夫还蛮多的，拜拜后还要替国宝推拿按摩松筋骨，还来得极喂早点和草莓口味的spirulina。到新办公室上班的途中，总会有点塞车，正好让我有丁点私人时间边听收音机边吃三文治。这又隐蔽又装神秘的办公室让我无时无刻都有卧虎藏龙的感觉，大开眼界。我，又有新的姿态了，这次我想让自己看起来更有专业的味道，只好随波逐浪了，只要吃力后不会不讨好，我也很乐意去伪装。

Quote8

Whatever does not kill you
really does make you stronger.

好想

好想 好想
好想 好想
好想 好想
好想 好想
好想 好想
好想 好想
好想 好想
好想 好想
好想 好想
好想 好想
好想 好想
重来好么？

609号房

昨晚，身在609号房，我并不太敢把事情的来龙去脉写在部落格，总担心有什么的躲在身后，有种心虚的感觉。其实，昨天凌晨电视机的白光雪花我是看得一清二楚的，荧幕右下角的“9”特别清楚，那感觉很清晰，我是肯定地清醒，还不止一次呢！然后，它就“自动地”被关上了，我的心当场寒一寒，还得装没事的深沉入睡，噢~为什么让我遇上这回事？

今晚，天天天晴。

离开，需要勇气。
留下，需要智慧。
相识，需要缘分。
相爱，需要包容与信任。

己所不欲，勿施于人。我真心希望我和大家都能在自己能力范围以内为身边的人多多着想，也想想自己每天睡醒开始新的一天，你幢憬的生活是什么画面？

To leave, needs the courage.
To stay, needs the winsdom.
To meet and to know each other, needs the fate.
To love and to be loved, needs tolerance and trust.

Don't do unto others what you don't want others do unto you.
- Tonite, I posted this note in my facebook wall: - is breathing that's all for living?? what if one day you woke up and found yourself at a different place, in a different house, pets lost, money gone, loved one no longer there, nothing belongs to you, only you, breathing...... what kind of life is that?

别让

当我将要进入极度害怕的时刻
我却本能地将害怕转化为保护的力量
我必当尽力去抵挡那恶的
我必尽全能去维护我爱的
这一切天降的勇气全赖-无悔的心-

这个凌晨锻炼了我的决心和面对的勇气
这个经历让我坚固了自己的信念
那个假镇定的恐惧肯定了我的价值
原来，我的极限又夸多一步了!


不想再有“早知道，就 ”的话就别自作聪明自作主张自私自我自寻烦恼，也别让自己只拥有自己，那将会很孤单。

精明的第一天

人生有起有伏
心情有好有坏
事业有起有落
咪咪有大有小
想不到驾车也有左右分叉路
第一天，就左右不分取错道了
第一天正正式式正正经经整整齐齐认认真真地早睡早起
还是敌不过太认真又心不在焉的那瞬间
我就像抛物线那样远离了Coastal Highway往咸蛋黄驶去。
好好笑吧~精明的我竟然败给blurblur的我。

赶不走的蛇

走!
走!走!走!走走走走走!!!!!
我还是没走，走不了，很心疼，开始不肯定明天会是怎样的心情了。

当蜂人遇上疯38--

--有你好看!!
一切预料中事，离开岗位之前必定遭受无法理喻的小家舌功，东百句，西千句，南北各万句，小家男小家女都38得不亦乐乎，真是-家家有堆能人所不能的cheap精-。

I never aim to snatch anything from you, so please don't over estimate yourself, you've got nothing worth my attention other than your stupidity. How could you treat me like that?! I ain't no thief u know... you don't have to pull back every item and lock them up from me. Afterall, they are just keys that I can't even use them to dig my nose - useless! You have lost my respect to you, and your "curiousity" has also gain you fame-of-naive. So now that I'm leaving... Good Luck to you!

Fistula

It's quite rediculous. I'm the one -Resilient- but I'm not the one suffering from the pain.
Not a good day for me, but still glad that my 555 booklet still there.

---------------Obviously------------------ was very sleepy----------------------------
For the past three days, dd was getting well interms of his mood and temper, I credited it to the DrElton's CD, peaceful nites as well, with laughters. Fistula was done finally, successfully. My laptop win7 upgrade also done, but not very good one. Guess it's not something fancy for a dummy like me, I just want my MSN back, why it's giving me hard time to chat LIVE? *sigh* and now, I can't even recall my password and there's only 2 persons on my Skype list. Good Or Bad???

Laughters~ LOL

The most pleasant thing is to hear someone Laugh Out Loud at my silly jokes. and it happens several times tonite~ :) How often do you bring laughters to people surrounding you? Have you ever care to make a silly face to make them happy? How loud could you laugh? and How loud could you make others laugh like crazy? How much of jokes have you listened to today? if you hear nothing... then, be the one to creates troubles.

Am I Resilience Enough?

Am I Resilience Enough? Here I googled it.....
This is the definition/explanation of it: Psychological Resilience--

"Resilience" in psychology is the positive capacity of people to cope with stress and adversity. This coping may result in the individual “bouncing back” to a previous state of normal functioning, or using the experience of exposure to adversity to produce a “steeling effect” and function better than expected (much like an inoculation gives one the capacity to cope well with future exposure to disease).^[1] Resilience is most commonly understood as a process, and not a trait of an individual.^[2]
Resilience is defined as a dynamic process that individuals exhibit positive behavioral adaptation when they encounter significant adversity, trauma,^[15] tragedy, threats, or even significant sources of stress^[16]. It is different from strengths or developmental assets which are a characteristic of an entire population, regardless of the level of adversity they face.

I am no psychologist, I do not know how to interpret my dreams my actions my mind. But 小木子said, Resilience best describe me. I am glad to hear new description other than "good" and "brave" and "strong".
Today is the 1st time for Ironman went tru the process all by himself. I must recommend you to get this CD - A Whole Brain InnerTalk Program by Dr. Eldon Taylor, you can find this from any Popular Bookstore in town, they are selling it for RM139.90. Amazing CD!! and You have to play it over the nite, at least throughout the Zzzz hours to see the effect. If you don't know which one I'm recommending, go google it yourself.

Friends Are To Remember, Not Recap

It's been months I didn't meet up with one of my gal friends, and today, she sent her warmest sweetest most lovely message to my facebook:
     May the little flowers lying in gloom,
     Rise and bloom, swaying endlessly,
     This way and that way,
     Morn to dusk everyday, Get well soon... to my fren..
To all my lovely Angels, THANK YOU ALL for always there to remember me, and always never stingy to care about me and my feelings, I've said it many many many times that GOD really sayang me and he sent me many Angels to look after me, I pray hard to God to please forgive my sin. I've already learnt the biggest lesson throughout my life. He too.
Last Friday I had a talkative nite @TGIF. Today, I have Angels from Jawi, from Kulim, from Butterworth, and from Bukit Mertajam, to buy me an expensive seafood lunch at BaliHai@GurneyDrive. Throughout my years of staying in Butterworth/Penang,  I was painted this perception that mainland people would not go over to the island 'for nothing' and those living in the island would not survive without GPS in the mainland as they rarely come over. See! True friends are to remember, when you remember him/her, you care, when you care, you will. You may not put it into actions, but you will keep the feelings in mind, and you will keep the friendship in heart. Those who always do RECAP in front of you, trust me, they are devils, they will do their very best detective ways to source rumors from everwhere and recap to you, recap to many others, to spread their gossips. In my Euthopia, let's forgive the devils,

1-rice-100-people

一种米养百样人。
‎有一种米, 吃了会降低智慧与人性, 还帮助白痴率的增长,由专业低B者为自身研发,看见了,你只需要喂食,不必购买。
还蛮多人的脑，是种草的。
别说古代，当今世上还是有人吃人的族群，吃了，也不会擦擦嘴。
我还常常辅导自己别浪费时间和那些脑袋低等的公司人计较，因为当前有更重要的事情要办妥，但低等动物的繁殖能力通常都很泛滥，它们勇於散播被它们误会误认误以为真的人与事。是与非，真的那么需要高层次的智慧，方能分辨事情的来龙去脉？

CheapSkate in my working place

I google it:

Search Results

1. 
   

   miser - a stingy hoarder of money and possessions (often living miserably).

   
   

   cheapskate - definition of cheapskate by the Free Online ...

Standards everywhere, differently, and I was taught to do things in STANDARDIZED way, and everytime I wanted to work differently with my different opionions, I was told I am wearing the SAME company hat under the SAME big umbrella. Okay~ now that I'm going to move myself to another department, I was told, I am NOT ALLOWED to bring along the LCD Monitor which paid by the current department because it (supposed) possessed by the department.
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm??? So, if the manager who approved the LCD monitor left the department, then I can come back and take it to my new office? Or, perhaps, I can just leave my exisiting laptop in KULIM and get my new boss to BUY me a BRAND NEW laptop in Penang? That sounds great!!! So, Shall I return the notepad I got from the KULIM administrator? What about the stapples-bullets I'm using? Shit! I have to return my calculator? GOSH~ I'm claiming the tolls and broadband services and.... DAMN IT!!! I cannot drive to Penang office to work now... shit. I have so many items I need to return to my manager so I could COME CLEAN to the new department. I never know I'm so SINFUL to have company properties coming along with me to join the new office place.
But it is ALRIGHT! you are not asking my calculator back becoz you think it worth nothing compared to the LCD Monitor... that somehow showed me what's inside your mind.. how narrow it is....and how you value things and ideas.
不是做大事的人，出头天 遥无期.

BeWiseBee

No matter how strong we could be, there're always times we need people to remind us to cheer us to pull us back on track. When I opened up my inbox, my eyes caught this forwarded mail, my maid sent me this short message:

A wise man once sat in the audience & cracked a joke. All laughed like crazy. After a moment he cracked the same joke again and a little less people laughed this time. He cracked the same joke again & again, when there was no laughter in the crowd, he smiled and said: --
"When u can't laugh on the same joke again & again, then why do u keep crying over the same thing over and over again? -- Forget the past & move on… "

Side-By-Side

Glad to see the numbers dropped from peak of 584.4(2/21) down to 298.9(2/24)! It may not be a solution, but as long as it helps, I don't see the reason for not accepting it.
Tonite, my pal shared me this clip: Stand By Me. I'm touched. Hope you like it too~
Life is full of so many unexpected, one needs to learn how to live to its fullest, not foolest.

Quote7

What comes out of you when you are squeezed is what is inside you – Wayne Dyer (shared by Madah)

==================================================================

What do you see coming out from me? I do see some silly shit out from those idiots trying so hard to squeeze their balls....

You Are Not Alone

Look around, you are not alone.
Cry, there's always shoulders to lean on.
Laugh, there's always friends to share jokes.
Shout, sure there's always someone echo you.
Look around, if you found nobody, love yourself, be true to yourself, talk to yourself, listen to your heart, follow him, he knows you well, he loves you, and thanks God, we are who we are.

Another Milestone....

A Day To Remember... Have Faith, Be Brave, With Love....To explore, To treasure, To appreciate, To give and To accept. To reach another milestone, we always just need to take the first step out and let God guides us the journey, we came naked, so we got nothing to lose, regardless.

What have you achieved in your life ...so far? Do you measure achievements by career-power? by social prestige? by financial status? by cash on hand? popularity? While WE're fighting hard for our life for our health like a warrior here....there are crazy people out there fighting over each other for fame in press for power for money for prestige:

『分燊歌』：
何家公雞何家猜，
何家等緊何生 Die,
何生 Die 咗何妻 Fly，
.......何妻 High 到 Give me five !

何妻分家唔洗猜，
二奶三奶同一 Line，
大奶四奶唔多 Buy !
何生律師Never Mind，
一於告到何妻 Cry !
大家不如猜一猜，最後邊個會仆街 ? ? ?

Frustrated by Annoying Irritations!

Seriously,
I'm the kind of person who can share things openly. I've got no secret to hide from. If I do, those are not secrets as claimed by "normal people", coz, secrets are meant to be discussed by unrelevant KPC (a.k.a Ke-Por-Chi), if I would have anything to hide from my fellow friends, those could be the things that need higher-intelligence to be digested, so make sure you have the brain to READ my mind when I can't TELL - as simple as that.

Fact #1 - I've been staying in pg for almost 2 months; you'd know if you know, if you don't, you shouldn't.
Fact #2 - I'm going to change my jobrole soon reporting to another boss at a different plant joining a totally different group than my current one. you'd know if you know, if you don't, it's just that you are not KPC enough :P
Fact #3 - I'm leaving my current easy  job considering to "explore" my brand new career life; you would understand my statement if you understand me well, if you don't, you are just a normal human being. You don't need to feel sick for guessing the wrong reasons.

Stay tuned for more reveals...................... by dunno when.

Happiness

I got this eye-catching bookmark from Popular bookstore today:

"Happiness Is Using Our Potential To The Fullest.
 Striving Against Difficulties And Overcoming Them.
 Reaching Out For Achievements And Finding Them.
 We Are Happy When We Are Learning, Growing And Accomplishing.
 We Are Happy When We Are Working Towards A Worthwhile Goal That Demands The Best Of Us.
 We Are Happy When We Are Helping Others To Succeed Along Life's Journey.
 Search For Happiness In Everything You Do!"

It's always my favourite Quote to tell: The most important thing for one's meaningful life is to Be Happy. Only when we are happy, we are satisfied, we are contented, we are appreciating what we have and what we do. Happy doesn't come Free. However, it's priceless. You can't wait for God to send you happiness, you have to make it happen yourself, with zero-cost of course. So why?? why trouble yourself to be in fears? It's just not worth a dime to dwell on sadness. God is not going to pity your tears. It's the BELIEF, belief that holds us strong. Just about a year ago, right before 2010 CNY, my galfren was crying over her "secret-lover" being revealed, it was a big-NO-relationship to be accepted by her parents. I remember I told her :"fren~ your mom is gonna be there as your mom forever, regardless. That guy is the man that going to be there for the rest of your life ONLY IF you insist and believe into the relationship. Don't Give Up!" She then cried, she's not gonna have a peaceful CNY..... oh Well!!! You know what is Make BELIEF?! A year later, yes, Rabbit year, on chap-goh-mei, this couple had their Register Of Marriage with the blessing of parents and family members and all the best wishes from friends, of course, and all the loves from her unselfish hubby.  Isn't this the bestest of best testimonial to share?? While I'm blogging this post, my deardear asked what am I doing over here next to his bed... ah ha~ I shared this lovely story to him and asked him not to give up. I read the bookmark to him, just like how we started 8 years ago...... it all started from my attitude of "I don't believe this. I want what I want." - so this was me, this is still me. I would say, I am really a lucky one. There is hardly any barrier in my life that could pull me down. I am always lucky to meet nice people helpful people noble people and plenty of chances. I do think everyone deserve a chance and also a second chance. Life is great, be happy to who we are today, and we shall never give up on hopes. God is watching us, God is really watching us, God will listen, God is listening. If I become blind one day, I don't need any proof to the existance of Sun. Hold our hearts together, that's the place we keep and to grow our beliefs.
Wish you all a Joyful Year!

第56天

在6 楼，晴。也晒。
身边认识的人，有拍胸口的，和不拍胸口的。拍胸口的人，会长翅膀，一边手拿星星棒，一边手按在唇边，静静的，精灵的，头顶发光的，眼睛亮亮的，星星棒一挥~功德无量的事就发生了。不属于拍胸口的人，什么都加个-不-字，但他们都有一颗善良的心，我会祈求神也带领他们一切平安。
最近他的脾气便得很暴躁，甚至会乱吼，是神在考验我的耐心么？不必了，这对我来说一点儿也不算考验，换成是护士们，才不管你心情好不好呢，工照做，屁屁照洗，更何况是我这最亲密不过的了，难不成我掩脸而去么？当年赶我不走，今天你也气我不去，你臭，我可比你更臭！两个人，亲不下去就是要硬斗了。

不必上班的日子

五天了。在过去上班的五天里，我竟然错过了那么重要的时刻，原来，真的不需要我的出现，进展还是会每一天累积的，惊喜就在我不必上班的日子呈现了，我又气又喜，孙先生说我过分紧张了。
今天的心情，突然不那么紧张彷徨了。凡人而已，还是会嗜睡，还是会心野，依然嘴馋，对电视节目难分难舍。这段不停安慰自己的日子，我竟然也同时安慰了好些人，翠玲说的有意思，我们不应该只用自己的那一套 套在别人的烦脑袋上；学习接纳吧。我觉得你我他应该做的事情，你和他未必认同，我也无法勉强，好吧~大家就尽量不增加彼此的烦恼吧！豁出去了！

夜 元宵

可以把元宵节当感恩日吗？有关心的鸡精礼盒，有花言巧语的白衣天使，有友爱的新鲜花束，还有血缘的慰问支持，还有还有，还有最值钱最有份量的女伴，和小魔王家庭扑心扑命的付出，小鸡啦，飞天天使，热热辣辣欢送会，今年元宵别有一格，竟然巧遇花车路经此地，我赶紧双手合一 对花车许愿，多想打开6楼窗户把柑抛出去再许个愿。
朋友，今夜 多珍重。
明天，多约会!

眼睡 =.=

眼皮累了。最近比较早睡，好现象，但肉体上的休息还是无法补充精神上的流失，我在想：该怎样去松弛我的紧张？Social life 我有啊~ 朋友聚餐也有啊~上网看电视聊电话我有啊~吃的份量也多了，碳水化合物的吸收也加倍，我害怕缺食会让我生病，水果也吃多了 害怕维他命不够，上班的时间也长了，害怕赶不上工作的进度，害怕耽误了同事们的进度，顾虑太多，会累，但只要回到609B，我就踏实了，只有实实在在地握住那双手我的心才能定下来，原来，两个人的意义就是酱。

MyValentine'sEvening

不一样的圣诞，不一样的新年，不一样的除夕，不一样的立春，不一样的情人节，一路走来，两个人，一条心。兔年的情人节我依然有赏心悦目的花，漂亮的牡丹花和清甜的橘子陪我们俩渡过了最亲蜜的日子最深的吻最难忘的兔。

昨天的心情起伏张力大得吓人，很快地调解忐忑的心，~凡事包容、凡事相信、凡事盼望、凡事忍耐、爱是永不止息~。国宝没放弃，曾子平医生也信心满满，我更是应该抹干眼泪坚持到底。

没有JackJack的第一晚。miss~

Life is like riding on a roller coaster.... there's always up and down, in such a momentum.

今晚，孤独的肚皮有两粒糯米糍相伴。

突破之旅

无从说起。
突破之旅，一点也不惊险，没有想像中那么冒汗，很为自己的勇气吐气扬眉了，过了一关，也不过如此，没什么大不了，小魔头妈妈也不过是要来壮壮胆，自己不跨过那一步，熊胆也帮不了。明天，就要和积积母子分离了，他会学哥哥那么乖巧吗？接下来抗魔的日子，我就愈来愈孤单了，必须越战越勇！

喘 。慌

假如，
有一天你在凌晨4点，因为呼吸困难呼吸急促而无法平静下来，在心中感到恐慌又无助的时候，打开眼睛发现身边没有人，你怕吗？然后就越怕越慌，越慌就越气喘。
我们，除了心里头要有喜欢的人，生活上要有亲朋戚友，身边总要有关心自己的人，在我们最无助最需要关心的时候，那种心灵感应是一支强心针，比高保额的保险金来得更强心。

请为你以后会凌晨气喘的日子，现在就做好准备。多多关心身边需要你的人，功德无量的爱心多多益善。

报到皮居天

年初八了，今晚要在鹰阁拜天公了。我的第一次呢!
又是第一天， 又是第一次，值得在这提一提。祝福我前程似锦吧!

我，报喜不报忧，因为我觉得身边少一个担忧的人，我就少一个烦恼。我错了么？
过去让它过去，来不急~

愤

愤，是因为不满 而生的一口闷气。
我愤，因为我无法迁怒於他人。
我再愤，我也不想有悔的一刻。
己所不欲，勿施于人，这包括了我们不想被对待的方式，不病的人能参透么？？？

这段日子，让我深深地体会到家庭教育的重要，人的思想思维心态观念，不管是感性的心智还是理性的行为，和高深教育或社会地位是未必成正比的，说浅白一点，上一代如何教育下一代去思考生存之道是很很很很很影响下一代的成长和往后处人待事的理念与态度。我真的很庆幸我来自一个那么信任与支持我的家庭，nene从小传授的都受益无穷，我为他们感到骄傲。人家说，付出不必求回报。我不认同，我现在所付出的，我每天每秒都期望能换回比以前更健康的国宝，我真的希望上天会回报给我更实在的进展。每当我信心满满的时候，我会突然被很无助的人与事打败，我很气，很愤怒，为什么神要创造那么多不同思维的脑袋？一个等待奇迹的病人还不够么？？为什么还要抛给我那么多外来的困扰，外在的难题？

假如这些不幸的考验降临在你身上，你会愿意去接受这种不妥善的待遇么？对不起，我也开始迷糊了，什么是妥善什么又是不妥善呢？只能说：人的价值观像黑洞，难以摸索。

你觉得你不会后悔的话，请便吧~

Quote6

Shared by Kiyomi-san:

Life is an opportunity, benefit from it.
Life is beauty, admire it.
Life is bliss, taste it.
Life is a dream, realize it.
Life is a challenge, meet it.
Life is a duty, complete it.
Life is a game, play it.
Life is a promise, fulfill it.
Life is sorrow, overcome it.
Life is a song, sing it.
Life is a struggle, accept it.
Life is a tragedy, confront it.
Life is an adventure, dare it.
Life is luck, make it.
Life is too precious, do not destroy it.
Life is life, fight for it.
~Mother Teresa

Life is sucks! you just have to suck it well!

And Life is not Love, so there is no betrayal, Life is all yours, be responsible coz you going to marry yourself.

Nothing is free under the Sun, so does LIFE.

~HoneyBee.

 

MiRaCle

我今天，如常，确定没便秘的问题，感恩；尿尿顺畅，感恩；臭屁没放，响屁倒是有，很爽，感恩；早餐在饭堂买了两块芋头糕，加点辣椒酱，三两口就吞得一干二净，感恩；外出午餐还有专车接送，手还很有力地拿着汤匙和叉，只管吃，嘴巴除了吃吃喝喝，还和饭友八卦说笑，真感谢主让我有眼有鼻有前有后有耳朵有嘴嘴牙齿喉咙舌头，手手脚脚健在五官也还算端正，能小便能大便原来是比中万字彩票更开心更欢乐！这个世界创造了Miracle这个字就是要解释那些突如其来的兴奋与雀跃,铁男终於可以动他的右脚了!还能双手合掌拍拍拍拍拍呢!!! 我感觉到他的小宇宙了!

不管你是小鸡还是天使，有翅膀还是飞不起，请你看到这里现在赶快马上立刻去小个便，检查它有没有异味，颜色请不清，尿量够不够，如常的话，请谢天谢地并带着感恩的心说：Mi Ra Cle !!

开工大吉

年初六 - 开工大吉!
熬过了那无法沉睡的数小时，赶紧起身煲了一锅的饭，换上了新衣，不匆不忙的就到办公室了开工了，好天，好时辰，好地点，好泊车，好风水，好不迷信。

放松

最近一直在听这个由美国Dr.EldonTaylor发明的“全脑开发- 内在交谈” CD，有一段话是“放松、放松、放松。。。” -- 放松，谈何容易，对生命对家人对自我价值 我是不可能置之不理，精神放松态度也得绷紧，认定了自己的价值观才会有生存的意义。我真的搞不清楚为什么都这个年代了还是有那么多无知的人为别人而活，把自己的灵魂存放在另一个无价的躯体上，然后再千辛万苦地祈求那躯体会好好保存那不属于他的灵魂，换成是你，你不累么？

压力，很无形，要拿走压力并不难，可以睡一个健康觉，可以练瑜珈，可以畅谈，可以大吃大喝，看看电视看看书本听听音乐环游世界，但要挪走制造压力的外人，OhMyGod! 这可以是一个很煎熬的过程，少点能耐与宽容的心就不成事了。朋友，关心我，请别来增加我的负担，你抛给我的压力，反弹力是超乎想像的，难道你就不能放松 放轻轻松松去给我轻轻松松的空间么？要不然，我借你copy Dr.EldonTaylor的自我肯定话语，你自己去听去学习，我没有时间和精力去开导你了。

愿大家，兔年 放松成长吧~
=============================================================

怪怪的，不是说好要好好轮流照顾国宝的吗？怎么我有股孤军作战的感觉？国宝今天心情和精神都好好，你们都不赶紧来看看他轻松的笑脸么？从窗外看去，交通好好 也没塞车啊~ 拜托~这里是医院 不是老人院，怎么遗弃感那么重，你说，你说，你要我怎么放松？？

牡丹花

紫的，黄的，粉红的，绿叶，假的牡丹假得好漂亮! 从6楼搬到3楼，再从3楼搬回6 楼，牡丹依然动人心扉，还附上大红彤彤的金兔大红包封和甜甜柑，新年气息，人身在何处又有什么相干呢？

兔gather - 大年初二

开年啰~! 咚咚咚咚锵! 立春了，今天开始，一切重新调解，整装待发，要好好利用自己的八字去改改运气了，风水师说得对，命的一半在于天时地利，我们无法预知或控制世界经济地理变换，但我们可以学习控制自己的言语举止，学习改正自己不完美的一面，学习自我增值，学习吸取贵人，学习中庸，学习慷慨，学习向善，学习多一点点的关心，学习对自己负责任，学习对家人承担，学习感恩，学习放下，学习不停的学习，也学习不停的分享、不停的教导身边的人。
对自己好好，就是对身边关心你的人的回报。
天助自助的人，我相信一切的不可能 有一天是会可能的。

Last nite I was watching Sammi's concert from Astro, Ironman bought me the original DVD from HK, love it! We wacthed it many times together. We also love the so-called modern-holy-songs sang by Sammi, nice one! One of my friends wrote it in facebook: "Watching Mi's concert.. listening to her old songs.. reminding things that have changed.." - yeah, me too.... her old songs reminded me alot a lot a lot.....it's been years... things have changed. and I just hope for a Better Change coming to me to all of us!
...如果今天將失去眼前的一切 剩低青風兩袖也不計 唯獨妳一個是 不可給取替 是我生命裡的一切 ... 如早知今生跟妳注定可相愛 而當初應更努力為未來 下半生 准我留住妳 一直相愛...

唯独你是不可取替

除夕-我的拥抱呢？

有惊无险的除夕日。好多人都回家吃团圆饭了。今年，我们在合你大道的吴潮记吃午饭特餐当团圆，芋泥好好吃，但我吃得心不在焉，不安的心不是没有理由的，最后换来有惊无险的一天。我的拥抱呢？留待年初一吧~

转机。转运

大人的世界没有百万富翁这硬板游戏么？还是百万富翁根本不再了不起？
兔年将至了，我没有做百万富翁的本事，我只希望能抽一抽机会，抽一抽命运，好让兔年事事如意，万象更新。今天赶得上为孙先生送上礼饼，反而是我满心欢喜，总觉得该为国宝做些什么的，我想，他也会和我一样感恩的，孙先生真的是难得的贵人，医者父母心，我能明白孙先生那天对我说的那一翻话，其实他不必心疼我的，直觉告诉我，他并没有当我是一般的顾客，那份真实又发自内心的关心我是感受到的，我很感激他，我很感激上天让我们遇到了这双妙手。接下来，就要遇上机会和好运了!

思

今晚一直在思考：为什么我还可以那么地冷静去大扫除，理发，上百货公司，和朋友聊天，再看超级星光大道。相信我，愈思念愈不会伤感下去，因为那将于事无补。

我知道有主与我同行

我没有经历洗礼，我称自己为没有洗过礼的基督徒，我相信主耶稣基督的存在。我遇见了许多行为不友善的基督徒，还有很多在言语上没有神爱的基督徒，让我很疑惑，所以我一直认为洗礼只是仪式上的肯定，去不去教会礼拜也不应该变成一种假惺惺的行为，相信神迹和感恩的人不应该只有在星期天才出现。我也不想有事没事地都去祈祷，总觉得那很打扰主耶稣，我也相信~一人信主全家得救~的说法，神的爱应该不是只建立在受洗的信徒上吧，在他之前，大家不都是罪人吗？很久以前在第一神召会常常这么唱：“我主与我同行，我跟随主脚踪，我主与我，我主与我，我主与我同在，我们赞美主 哈利路亚，我们歌颂耶和华，我们赞美主 哈利路亚，我们歌颂耶和华。”从小就往主日堂崇拜了，到大学到工作到今天，每当我软弱的时候我还是唱着同样的这首诗歌来坚定自己的信念。当年在美国患上肾感染的时候，虽然我是眼前一片黑就昏过去了，但在往医院急救的路途中，我心里不停地唱不停地哼，还有，当家人患病进院时，我也是不停地唱，晚上害怕漆黑的我也唱，beanbean病的时候我也唱，感觉就是那种过关斩将 神必怜悯我的安慰。神啊~我已经唱了一个多月了，是我的歌声不够甜美吗？还是我唱的不够大声 不够响亮？好想回到从前， 能重来，那就好了。


我知道，有主与我同行；艰难路，靠他终必得胜；
风和雨，走过一程一程；他恩典，陪伴仍然够用。
我朋友，你可经过伤痛；来主前，他能医治你心；
纵然那，多少飞雪飘零；十架爱，乃为你我作成。
勇敢的心，能冲破冰封；用我的祈祷，融化冬的寒冷。
飞翔的心，能穿越迷林；让爱的旗帜，照亮你我前程。

上一堂快乐天堂课

应该学习的，应该做笔记的，应该分享的一堂课：

... ... ... ... about happy lives. There are 3 elements for life satisfaction (LS):

1.       Pleasant life (PA) – pleasure feeling, temporary happiness, triggered by sensual feeling, usually material dependent. E.g. favourite food, listen to music, reading, movie, gaming, etc

2.       Engagement (E) – feel of belonging, hobby, high interest at your job (until you forget about time and you still care about your job during outstation), its happiness lasts longer than PA. E.g. exercise, dancing, enthusiastic to your job, etc

3.       Meaningful life (M) – service (your devote yourself for others), self-fulfilling & flourishing, the most long-lasting happiness. e.g. charity, what you do is for the sake of somebody else, esp your family, your job is about the accomplishment of others which gives you the great sense of meaningful life.

So, LS = PA + E + M

If you can have all 3 (note that only E and M can provide long-lasting happiness), you are probably happy in your life J

人定胜天

又怕, 又还很有信心,
又担心, 但又很庆幸,
就很像我常常很饱了但嘴巴还是很爱乱吃.....
最尖锐的矛和最坚韧的盾say Hi~

每次我替自己做Reflection的时候，我都会检讨：下一次该怎么Handle才会让自己过得更快乐呢?每一次的自我改变我都会以快乐人生为大前提，也尽量让我关心的人不必太烦恼，然后，每一次我都会很感恩因为我总是幸运的，我总会遇到很好的际遇，就算是失意的时候都会很快的有转机，很低落的时候都会有贵人相助，尽管到了这一刻，我想起了许多的曾经许多的为什么和许多的承诺，我还是很肯定，我们的相识相知是一件幸运的勇敢，对，当初的决定是我的勇敢，那完全是一个不带风险的勇敢，我今天的坚持是当初勇敢种下的根，根深蒂固，谁要我把这根拔掉 是需要比勇敢更勇的勇气了，你有么？你能么？你明白么？

（最初的天堂 最重的荒唐 如果还有遗憾 又怎么样呢？）

休息

日出而作。日落而息。是么？？
我最近的生活，好像当年在Houghton的冬天那样，天还没亮就起身干活了，到我能歇一歇的时候已是午夜了，就像现在，终於能坐下来轻一个松 ，格一个部落，再灌一罐余仁生杏仁鸡精，连简讯也越来越简短了。

我，休息了5年，怎么还是觉得休息不够？我就这样被白痴误解了5年，被瞎眼批判了5年，被口臭毒舌了5 年，被剑客们暗放了5年的毒箭，被探子明查暗访了5年，我连什么也不做都会被纠缠得好累好累！还说什么休息是为了走更长远的路，我呸！路都被人搞轧了，还走什么走？我宁可自己拿斧头去辟我独家的私家路。

怕

红色的心 变白了，没有血色的心--怕。那种怕的感觉，很心寒。
人生难测，人心难估，人言可畏，但，我还是相信，人定胜天。

探子

爱听故事的人 比比皆是，说故事的人 不胜枚数，处处都是探子，能了解当中喻意的又有多少人呢？当今的探子，都忘了探索的原因，只求满足个人好奇心，不赚钱的消息也乐意日日夜夜时时分分秒秒地探个不停，直到目标人物全盘托出，然后就是一连串的故事延续篇。。。延续。。。改篇。。。再延续。。。再改篇。。。继续延续。。。继续改篇。。。


还是不研讨探子话题了。
我相信好人有好报，我说那人好，他就是好人，看不走眼的，这世界那么多好人，上天会先优待谁呢？排队要拿号码么？拿眷顾号码会遇到黄牛党吗？到底是哪个画家给天使们绘上雪白的翅膀？天使都一定长翅膀么？长翅膀的天使都会飞么？不会飞的天使会哭哭啼啼么？天庭外的小鸡会渴望有一天化身为天使么？？天使会想要当探子吗？探子小鸡会幻想自己成为雪白天使吗？好混乱。好混乱。你看得懂我吗？

自我突破

人，跟自己比赛就好了。一山还有一山高，对宇宙来说，我们再渺小不过了，比别人强又有什么了不起呢，比内心的自己更强才是难，因为那是挑战极限，挑战自己认为不可能的极限，好笑吧，人往往自己设定了一个框框，再抓一大堆很像很有道理的理由让自己很安全地不超过界限，碰到了框框就感觉很101% 了，我就是这种人，我从来不喜欢和别人明争暗斗，我觉得我从不去理会别人有多强，我做好自己就对得起天地良心了，这几天和这几个星期我上了很奥妙的一课：突破其实很简单，就是把自己认为不可能的事情-敢敢做-! 又不是杀人放火，又不是打家劫舍，又不会身上少一块肉，又不会亏了身家，做到了，就会发现：噢~做到了，不过如此。那做到与做不到的一线之差，肉眼根本看不见，人的意志力真的好可怕，就和人的自卑感一样可怕，那么无形却又那么威力无穷!

有谁一出娘胎就会跑跑跳跳说说笑笑呢？我们都是哭哭的来，然后上天让我们自己选择自己舒适的笑声，听我们喜爱的笑话，直到有一天我失去笑的能力，我还是希望我不会哭着离开。
-What's up?-
Twenty five years and my life is still Trying to get up that great big hill of hope For a destination
And I realized quickly when I knew I should That the world was made up of this brotherhood of man, For whatever that means
And so I cry sometimes When I'm lying in bed Just to get it all out. What's in my head
And I am feeling a little peculiar, And so I wake in the morning, And I step outside
And I take a deep breath and I get real high, And I scream at the top of my lungs:
--What's going on?
And I say, hey hey hey hey, I said hey, what's going on?
Ooh, ooh ooh, And I try, oh my god do I try, I try all the time, in this institution
And I pray, oh my god do I pray, I pray every single day, For a revolution
And I say, hey hey hey hey, I said hey, what's going on?

我回家了

回家了，开始感冒病发作了，还是最好把病菌锁在家里，希望今晚能认认真真的睡一觉吧。

我对今天的进展很满意，感觉一切开始朝正面去，正能量的宇宙 很强，就算是很期待的我 也有点措手不及，不管身在何处，能放开怀的大声豪笑，是一种天赐的幸福，求不得。下周一就要向手杠挑战了，我需要趁周末储存更多的信心！

RajaUda的红灯笼好喜气，但春节夜市糟透了，还看见酷似火柴型的女人，应该不是变性的吧，大板烧有点失色但还是感觉好好吃，竹蔗蜜枣水虽然可口但杀不了我的病菌，大家要小心感冒 提防发烧。

偷得浮生半日闲

终于偷得浮生半日闲~ 松一松~透一透~洗洗剪剪染染吹吹，花钱真的可以减压。

一句钟的能量，很难得，原来这世界上有千千万万无数的事情是值得我们去庆祝的。

大宝森节

第二十五天，晴，街上多车，友情满满，笑声乐乐。
又来了一个新的花篮，还有新鲜水果，我有几声咳，喉咙痛，昨晚没睡好，一直被国宝弄醒，怎么他整晚睡不稳呢？人精神了，动作也多，真让我哭笑不得。好朋友的关心和鼓励真不是盖的，国宝笑得好开心，朋友也聊得很起劲，贵人到访，传了好多好多的贵气给他，快快旺起来吧。

--------------------------------------------------------------
车子修好啰! 又惊又怕的日子过去啰! 值得我乱闯去买KFC套餐吃~因为那笑声太太太太太让我心花怒放了!

一笑解千愁

一大清早，火星人不但开眼睛望我，还被我发现他嘴角翘了一翘 在偷偷笑，我说，我看见啦，我发现那嘴角啦，火星人竟然笑开怀了，多难得~ 2月4号立春快快来吧，我等不及要和我的好运气接吻啦！

槟城炒粿条-真香！真Q!

好天气，好心情，坏运气。
大热天时，汗流浃背，明明风水师算我将在兔年行好运，偏偏就是要在虎年尾给我的老车死火，讨厌死了，急死人，又怕，又要跟自己说不能怕，又担心会有掠夺匪打抢我，又担心不能及时见到国宝，又怕天入黑以后我一个人怎么带老车回北海，吓死了。
外表淡定的我，还好有小魔头妈妈，真的一个call就找到救星了，问你服未？！
运气坏不坏 还真的避不了也挡不了，重点是事情发生后你有没有贵人相助，我就有！没办法，今晚只好留在国宝这，贵人，贵精也贵多，我的-长翅大只佬-又来送外卖了。最近才发现，槟城的炒粿条真的真香真Q真好吃! 我嗅到浓浓的人情味。

外人。请便

真的意料之外，黑皮阿杜也来探访了，但我还是狠下心肠把阿杜挡在门外，看什么看呢？一丁点儿忙也帮不上的又何苦让国宝不悦呢？难得今天国宝心情愉快，我也乐开怀，我发现我的欢乐天堂真的来了好多好多好多漂亮小天使！

大只佬也有翅膀

很神奇吧?! 我竟然在手机电话簿里把他楸出来，一通简讯，就有槟城炒粿条外卖专送到门口，把我今晚孤独的胃轻易地解闷了，想不到吧，大只佬也长有翅膀哦！
今日功课：别把朋友忘了，可以忘记的朋友你也别要了，为了不忘记，每日都要复习朋友守则喔 ！我还是那句：朋友守则（一）：朋友是要来利用的！弊弊的。。。不要也罢，有，就打开电话簿大扫除吧。

曙光

不一样的星期天，我看见天使，也看见曙光。
白衣天使的笑声再大也特别好听，因为国宝让她们笑了，白衣叔叔的笑容也充满了正能量，真是国宝修来的福，那么多的贵人，那么多的关怀，要好好感恩了。今天阳光特别灿烂，我也换上了一套碎花上衣，希望国宝看见也分外精神吧~ 哈-想太多了。

大扫除

一大早, 新的一天。
好天气，新气象，莫名其妙的动力，人的意志力很奥妙很无边无际，就那条线，跨过了就海阔天空。今天在家大扫除，扫扫扫 丢丢丢 除除除 旧的坏的不要的讨厌的通通去去去！剩的正能量才有空间越增越强。

SuperMan的威力!

什么时候开始，笑，变成了一种奢侈？
上回看见国宝笑，已经是去年的事了。今晚的笑很突然，很欢欣，很意外，很恰时，也让我很踏实。今晚国宝熟睡的呼噜声也让我踏实的心更踏实，我终于能确定国宝是熟睡而不是在昏睡了。想不到Superman的典故会这么受落，我悉心的照料竟然比不上一个活生生的例子。

今天，挣扎了一个早上的电邮，发出去了。
我不知道将来会有什么变化变卦，至少我尽力了。- 神助自助的人--

火星人与地球人的雷达

今天火星人向我说了好多火星话，我居然都听懂！真感激上天赐我的语言智慧，我们的雷达只需双掌紧握就能传达了，多神奇。我不需要学会唇语也能知道火星人想对我说什么，因为我真的听得一清二楚，你知道那需要多大的力量吗？说完了，就像能量灭了 需要再充电， 然后，又再努力尝试。谁说蜜蜂听不懂熊猫话？

今晚，因为我的八卦，隔壁床的叔叔问我：Why There's So Many Nice People Here In This World ? 为什么这个地方让我碰上那么多的好人？对，叔叔是在说本人，我对叔叔说：What Goes Around, Comes Around, and It's Better to Give Than Receive.

食得是福

相信蜂言蜂语：食得是福。
这天赐的福气有两种说法：吃不吃得下，和吃得爽不爽。我会很贪心，我要很爽很爽的吞下去才有满足感，有愉快的心情去品尝食物才得以享受人间美食。某些人某些时候真的需要一副-能-吞得下的舌头，

上心下心

不安的一天。
早上我还这么唱：太阳出来了，片地野花香。。。中午又是一阵漫长的等待，到了下午，我开始心慌了，那通电话让我很气，气自己太天真了，美国人哪懂人情味！人，始终还是靠自己最实际。慌了，就乱了阵脚，乱了，就守不住脾气了，骂了，泄了，也于事无补，对解决事情毫无帮助。人定胜天，好吧，咬紧牙根，挨过去就过一关了，负能量万万要不得，此刻的我，不是神，不是圣人，不是仙，也不是魔术师，我只祈求奇迹降临，福气显现，灵气保佑，气馁消失。我相信，我是幸福的。

撒娇王

放工后急匆匆地看皱眉王，坏心情全写在眉间，我看见那碗不见底的麦片粥，心知不妙，解释了老半天，才把那叠叠皱眉摊开。今天终於看见窗外的阳光了，有树有高楼还有夕阳。晚餐的心情 轻松。美禄的心情 漂亮。感恩，正能量满满。今晚一眠 格外滋味。为了一日五餐，为了心无牵挂，为了撒娇王，我愿了。

满心欢喜

一碗一碗暖稀粥 多饱满
一口一口白开水  多活力
一句dear dear 多动听~

x秒

心灵感应 好神奇。亲人的气息，我想，站多远还是会感应到的，只希望，所感应到的都是正能量。果然，昨晚那奢侈的几秒，要等了一整天才在这晚延续了多几秒，但足以让我心满意足，我也感应到国宝使劲努力的气息，时间吧，我们仅有的财富。
我并不富有，我没那多余的时间，我也留不住时间。

神迹

You will when you believe
I will when I believe
坦白说，今天还真的有点泄气，国宝一整天都不要看他最喜爱的National Geographic，嘴巴也紧紧闭着，皱起眉头，我按着他双手祷告，感恩，我们有的是时间。午夜，我把灯关上，他才愿意把眼皮撑开，我们在午夜终於对望了好几秒，多奢侈啊，留多几秒给明天吧~

SuperMarioBrother!!

还有好多关要闯
要顶砖 要吃蘑菇 还要踏走死乌龟
矮矮都要跳高高去顶 才会有金币
一关过了又一关
玩了一系列又会有更新的系列
我要像SuperMario!!

分享。分担

分享，果然是全世界最最最最最容易办得到的事情，决定的因素只有 愿意 或 不愿意。多简单，不费力，不吃亏。
分担，很艰难，完全不是你说想分担就真的能分担。安慰么？开解么？鼓励么？掏腰包？出钱出力？说动听的话？还是列出某某更糟的例子？这都只不过在帮忙，帮大忙，减轻某程度的负担，或越帮越忙，真正的痛，能体会么？真正的伤能防效么？真正的泪，你舔么？那种害怕低落沮伤彷徨恐慌失措彻夜难眠受尽煎熬的-重担- 不是当事人真的扛不起。这个担，旁人该如何担呢？豁出去了，我要当个正能量的女超人，向软弱充电，向恐荒绝缘。对的人，在对的时间，总有对的解决方案，放下担子，才能腾出双手来迎接solutions.                                      

福气

今天很自然地，凌晨4点人就醒了，没有闹钟，就一直等白衣天使们来，今天却比平时迟，5点才开工。在我对着镜子洗刷时，突然很感恩：怎么上天一早就安排好了呢？太奇妙了！人与人的相识相知真的很奇特，不能天天面对面的好朋友，还是有用得着的时候，而且，往往都是帮大忙的天使。近视眼的我，contact lens 真的难得恩物，几个月前小白天使送我好几盒他已不适用的高品质contact lens， free的，度数竟然恰好和我的吻合，还是daily disposable 的，我不客气的thank you 一声就收下了。在这段奔波忙碌昼夜不分的非常时期，这一双一双的隐形眼镜简直就是我的救星！假如没有小白天使的“礼物”，我可能又多一个不方便的烦恼了。
-- 施比受更为有福 -- 在我身边的小天使是上天赐我的福气，要珍惜。感恩。

Quote5

虽然我们不能完全控制外在环境，但我们的内心，却能由自己来掌控。
-- 心灵当自强。

感恩

通常，大家会说：出路遇贵人 / 出外靠朋友，
我说，上天派了好多好多的漂亮小天使给我，谁说远水不能救近火，我就是感受到那雪中送炭的暖意，振奋人心，但还是不敌国宝呼我一声的定心丸。
小天使1号：谢谢你在寒夜为我准备的凉茶!
小天使2号：谢谢你的热汤面!
小天使3号：谢谢你替我攀梯换灯泡!
小天使4号：谢谢你把第一次交了出来，让你痛了，你真的好棒!
小天使5号：谢谢你越洋的鼓励和简短的慰问，精神支持-priceless!
小天使6号：谢谢你突然的拜访，你适时送来的晚餐不迟不早的解决了我眉头的燃火，汉堡包正好把我的眼泪都往肚子里塞去。
小天使7 8 9 10 11 12 号：谢谢你们不吝啬的简讯和留言，原来我不是一个人的。
记住：
-好朋友是要来-利-用的，谢谢你们都那么爱我。感谢主，阿门。

不一样的星期天

不一样的星期天 有着不一样的意义
星期天 是造物者的休息天
也是被造者的休息天 历来不变
就算你被某些事情缠住了 我能肯定 你心中期待零压力的星期天。
2011年的第一个星期天 我休息不来 我一丁点想休息的念头也没有 我只有一个信念
明天会更好。
看着国宝休息了那么久 不担心是骗人的 很开心也不是骗人的 因为 日子是会过去的 时间是会让伤口痊愈的 我的人 就是怪 我有很强的-我不信-的概念 我就是不相信不可能 所以才会看见了许多的可能。
上天是会眷顾我的。
原来，我们已经好久没有在一起这么长时间了。搞错场地了。

Hi~ Mr.Eleven!!

嗨~ 2011。
我期待你的来临，我等候你的神迹，我允许你让生命重新洗牌，我需要你的祝福，我准备好了，你就快快降福吧! 父，显现您的神迹吧，您的聆听让我充满力量，您赐我的智慧让我更坚强，假如这一切都是您对我的考验，我愿意努力的奉上100分，您 许可么？


笑就歌颂,一皱眉头就心痛. 我没空理会我,只感受你的感受.
你要往哪走?把我灵魂也带走,它为你着了魔,留着有什么用?
你是电,你是光,你是唯一的神话, 我只爱你,you are my super star
你主宰,我崇拜,没有更好的办法,只能爱你, you are my super star
手不是手,是温柔的宇宙, 我这颗小星球,就在你中转动.
请看见我,让我有梦可以做, 我为你发了疯,你必须就理我.
你是电,你是光,你是唯一的神话, 我只爱你,you are my super star
你主宰,我崇拜,没有更好的办法,只能爱你, you a my super star
你是意义,是天是地是神的旨意, 除了爱你,没有真理.
你是火,是我飞越的尽头, 没想过要逃脱,为什么我要逃脱.
谢谢你给我,一个快乐的梦游,如果我忘了我,请帮忙记得我.
你是电,你是光,你是唯一的神话,我只爱你, you are my super star
你主宰,我崇拜,没有更好的办法,只能爱你, you are my super star

感谢主,
你为我准备了太多的小天使，
在我软弱的过去 总出现关心我的小天使，
想不到你还派了大只佬来替我换灯泡，
让我不必在漆黑夜里许新年愿望，
一碗热汤面让我顿时觉得力量无穷呢！
感谢主。